WHAT are your biggest Tinder profile turn-offs?
Among the singles I know in the region, there are a number of complaints I hear all too often.
It’s just one too many dead pigs for comfort, which brings me to a list of the biggest complaints I’ve heard.
If you’re wondering why you’re not getting the responses you’re seeking, it might be time to cut some of these habits.
Dead fish, dead pigs
I sometimes wonder if people just need a special app to show off their dead fish to each other.
Perhaps they can swipe to rate their catch. I should patent this and become rich.
So many Tinder users will have at least one dead fish or pig in their profile.
While we know wild boar numbers are being kept in check, I wish someone would do the same for this token craze that really is becoming a wild bore.
Stop. Poking. Out. Your. Tongue.
It’s truly mystifying as to why anyone thinks this is an attractive pose.
Five photos in a row without a single smile? It’s literally uncomfortable to scroll through such seriousness.
“I’m not here to %&*# spiders”, “I just want milk that tastes like real milk”, “here for a good time, not a long time”, “looking for my Tinderella”.
Bad photo angles
No one is perfect. But there are photo angles and then there’s the boomer grandad angle that leaves you seeing more neckbeard than face.
Put simply, stop taking your photos from below.
If selfies are photos you take of yourself, are butt pics butties? I’m not really so sure. But they need to stop.
We get it. You want to meet up with people behind your partner’s back.
But that weird close-up of your eyeball, bellybutton or pet goldfish is fooling no one.
Jabs at your ex
Every so often there’s a profile where instead of listing of their hobbies and interests, a single will descend into a rant about their ex partner or previous dating experiences.
Leave the baggage at the virtual door, please.
Ah, unicorn hunting. The practice of couples going online to try and find a woman to join them in their relationship and date both parties at once.
Surely there’s some other app for that?
If you have cartoon dog ears then I’m sorry, we just can’t talk.