If you’re single, there’s a strong chance you are or have been one of Tinder’s 50 million users.
Does your profile leave a lot to be desired? Not doing well at converting matches into dates? Here’s 11 ways to win at Tinder.
1. Pick your pictures wisely
That means staying away from group shots, or those super arty ones (rubbish blurry ones) that don’t actually show what you look like. If I can’t work out which one you are in your pictures, I’ll assume there’s a reason why you’re hiding behind everyone else. Also, it’s nice to know who you’re actually talking to. This isn’t Habbo Hotel, guys.
2. Animal pictures aren’t always a winner
I’m looking at those of you who think it’s cool to put up a picture of yourself holding a big dirty fish. Are you trying to show you’re a rugged hunter gatherer type? It’s not working. Leave the old trout out of your profile (also applies to your ex, BOOM BOOM. Sorry…).
3. Use that text box
Putting something in there makes it a lot easier for other people to draft a good opener. Just a couple of points giving your matches a brief idea of what you’re like. Please don’t put your whole CV in there, the chances of anyone being interested in how you worked your way from stacking shelves in a supermarket to an entry level position at a recruitment firm are slim to none.
4. Remember that this is a dating app
To all you people who are only on there for the ego boost of matches and Moment likes, and have no interest in talking to or meeting people – get out. Take a long hard look at yourself, go and find yourself a hobby and stop wasting everyone’s damn time.
5. Conversation is key
Seriously, just say something. Starting a conversation is difficult, I know. ‘Hey, how are you?’ can be forgiven on the first message. Just a ‘Hey’ isn’t great but it’s a start.
6. The invisible ‘why?’
When you’re talking to someone, expand. It’s better to have too much to say than nothing, as making someone feel like they’re drawing blood out of a stone isn’t fun for anyone. Someone asks how you are, you’re good… But tell them why. “I’m good, I’ve just eaten a massive pizza and seen off a whole bottle of wine.” Not the most exciting chat, but it builds the groundwork for a good flow of conversation to go down. If someone asks how your weekend was, tell them why it was great/average/poor.
I’ve got plenty of walls in my house, if I wanted to talk to someone with nothing to say I’d sit in front of one of them.
7. Be yourself
Someone being themselves is much more impressive than someone being different to try and impress the person they’re talking to. Obviously keep out the things you talk to your friends about, like your bowel movements and the spot that’s waiting to rear its ugly head on your chin, but if you’re being overly polite it won’t bode well when you have a couple of drinks and your real self comes out in person.
8. Leave the money chat out of it
Money talk makes a lot of people feel very uncomfortable. If you wipe your arse with £50 notes, there’s only a select few who will appreciate knowing that. If you’re skint, plan a date that you can afford and wait until you’re comfortable you know a person well enough to say your money pot is dry.
9. Keep it clean
There are some people who would prefer not to talk about anything sexual with someone they haven’t yet met. If you’re all for it, test the waters and make an informed decision on whether or not this person is open to it. Do not under any circumstances send someone a picture of your genitalia unannounced. The success rate of this turning out well is probably very small.
10. Be honest with your intentions
It’s highly unlikely that everyone on Tinder is specifically looking for a relationship. But, the great thing about it being 2015 is that we’re all free to express our sexuality however we damn well please. Someone who’s only looking to get their leg over will gain a lot more respect from being honest about it than someone who blags their way into another person’s bed with little white lies.
It will probably make your life a lot easier if you’re honest as well, as there are a lot of people out there who unsurprisingly don’t like being lied to.
11. Be aware of time frames
With something like Tinder, it’s very easy to move on and find someone else if there’s no date arranged after a while of talking. Suggesting it after a matter of hours is too soon to work out whether you’re interested in meeting them, and waiting too long makes you look like a pen pal. I know, the politics of online dating.
I’d say a week is enough time to figure out if you want to meet someone, and a date should be arranged after speaking for that long.