Bloke ends 19-year marriage so he can date TWO women at the same time | #facebookdating | #tinder | #pof

A BLOKE ended his marriage of 19 years so he could explore polygamy – and is now dating two women at the same time.

Entrepreneur, Shai Fishman, 46, from Pennsylvania, USA, became unsettled so he and his wife Danielle, 42, tried having an open marriage – but broke up six years ago as it didn’t work for her.


Shai Fishman, 46, end his marriage and now has two girlfriends Credit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

Shai was inspired to become one part of a polyamorous triad after watching two TV shows titled Big Love & Polyamory and Married and Dating – and has since become involved with Lea, 40, and Krissy, 41, who he met on an online dating site.

Having always struggled with the idea that he was only “permitted” to express romantic affection for one person, Shai realised he wasn’t meeting all of the six core human needs.

“I subscribe to the Tony Robbins philosophy that we can all measure our life fulfilment based on six core human needs that either get met or don’t,” Shai said.

“These are feeling safe, significant, loved, and also having variety, growth, and service. Whilst my marriage with Danielle might’ve seemed perfect by other people’s standards, I was only getting the needs of safety, significance, and love.”


He met Lea, 40, and Krissy, 41 on an online dating siteCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

It was at that point Shai and Danielle decided to give polyamory a go but after seven-months, Danielle struggled and didn’t want to share the nature of their relationship with their kids.

Now, Shai is incredibly happy with his current girlfriends, who were both monogamous before he converted them.

The throuple admit to having an open relationship but for the most part, but they are committed both emotionally and sexually.

Lea also shares Shai’s passion to advocate for relationship freedom and together, they’ve created the online community, Leveled Up Love – an active Facebook group which connects over 4400 poly-curious people from across the world.


Shai was always interested in polygamy but it didn’t work for his wife DanielleCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy


Both woman insisted they were monogamous until Shai converted them Credit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

Sharing his relationship in public has meant they’ve received many strange looks from people when they display affection – but admits they’ve never received any rude comments.

Despite going their separate ways, Danielle now lives in a dwelling on Shai, Lea, and Krissy’s shared property along with her partner and three children.

Speaking of his marriage with Danielle, Shai said: “We were together for around nineteen years and things changed around thirteen years into our marriage.

“I’d always had questions around monogamy and being with one person. Then I saw the shows Big Love & Polyamory and Married and Dating, and read a few books. These gave me a whole new perspective and an appetite to learn more about ethical non-monogamy.”


The now have a public forum promoting their relationshipCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

“Those shows and books led to an intense six-year conversation as it’s something Danielle wasn’t interested in exploring at first. About three years into that conversation, we began to explore the outskirts of polyamory.

“Additionally and against my wishes, Danielle decided to keep the notion of polyamory a secret from the kids. That was a lot of weight hearing questions like ‘where’s mum or dad going,’ without being able to give an honest answer.

“I would’ve preferred to have let them know in a proper way. Also, the new relationship energy with her partner, Mike, also meant some of our open marriage agreements were broken like our ‘no other partner sleeps over without consent’ rule.

“Danielle was challenged emotionally and she asked for a divorce seven months into our open marriage.”

Shai met Lea and Krissy shortly after this, and are still happy together today.


The throuple have been happy together for six yearsCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy


They have an open relationship but are committed to one another Credit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

“I believe Lea had mismatched values with her ex-husband and I think there were also feelings for other people which her marriage didn’t allow her to explore,” Shai said.

“I met Krissy five months after meeting Lea – both on a dating site. They both listed themselves as monogamous and ticked ‘polyamory not for me’ but I don’t let that stop me from connecting. You never know how open-minded someone may be.”

Shai admits that he’s probably dated more monogamous women “than I can count” and has had many conversations and minds opened.

If the majority of monogamous relationships fail, people inevitably have questions so they say let’s look at this other option.

“Our triad dynamics ebb and flow. We have times where we focus on each other and times when we pull back. There’s an overarching commitment to each other as a family.


The throuple live on the same property as Shai’s ex wife Danielle and their kids, as well as Danielle’s new boyfriendCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

“There are also times when they have partners – I’d call them connections. Neither of them have had a long-term partner yet. We refer to them as ‘connection-ships’ which is somewhere between a one-off and a committed relationship.

“Going back to Danielle, once she’d asked for the divorce, I asked if she and her boyfriend, Mike, would move in alongside my girlfriend and for a time, we ended up having four adults and four kids living in a kind of tribal environment – a community if you will – on the same property.

“This is something I’d like to explore more of. Personally, there’s a deep desire to build a love-tribe – bringing in more female and male partners.

“When it comes to growth, polyamory has allowed me to grow exponentially both emotionally, erotically, spiritually, professionally, and I’ve had the opportunity to be in service to more people.


Shai says people often stare but he’s used to itCredit: MDWfeatures / @shai_the_poly_guy

“I just want that to have a seat at the table in terms of discussing how people can find happiness in open relationships.”

Shortly following his divorce with Danielle, Shai explained the concept of polyamory to his children but just like his community, friends, and other members of his family, his children were nothing but accepting.

“I’m very open with the kids now. After we got divorced, I explained the concept of polyamory and alternative relationships and said this is what your dad is,” Shai said.

“It just became their new normal. There are moments when they worry about what their friends might think but everyone’s been nothing but accepting in our neighbourhood.

“In promoting our Facebook community, Leveled Up Love, every so often you get online comments that say what we’re doing is wrong but that’s fine because you’re dealing with the masses.

“Our family and friends have been accepting and in terms of being out in public, we’re not overly affectionate but when we are, we get stares, but nobody says anything.

“We have our community because we want conscious, consensual non-monogamy to have a seat at the table and we’re okay with sprinkling that awareness in public.

“I think the argument of monogamy vs polyamory is often too simplified considering how complex those ideas are. Comparing them isn’t terribly useful. Instead, it’s more about which relationship strategies help people meet their core human needs and find happiness.

“People need to have those conversations and check in with their partner or partners – to see if they’re getting the freedom, growth, healing, and opportunities to be in service that they desire.”

In other relationship related news, a polyamourous throuple say they are all equal but only he has sex with wife and girlfriend who is 23-years-younger.

Meanwhile a mum-of-four, 37, got ‘bored’ of her marriage and started dating another man AND his wife.

And a gorgeous mum looks better at 41 than she did at 21 reveals her unusual anti-ageing tips… from ditching cardio to eating SIX meals-a-day.

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