Weddings are expensive affairs so it isn’t uncommon to be invited to one without the option to bring a plus one.
But this hasn’t stopped one woman from requesting she be allowed to bring a date to an upcoming wedding, much to the bride’s distress.
She explains on Reddit she has had to make a lot of changes to her wedding due to the coronavirus pandemic, reducing the guest list from 250 people to only 46 “with no out of town cousins even included”.
“I did invite my two very best friends, like sisters to me, as my bridesmaids. My fiancé didn’t invite any of his friends,” she writes.
“Three weeks before the wedding, my step sister is demanding she bring her boyfriend of less than six weeks (or at least some sort of date) to the wedding,” the bride explains. “She said she feels extreme anxiety going alone.”
She said the request has left her feeling “disrespected”.
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“I absolutely feel it’s disrespectful to my fiancé and so many of our friends and extended family to have a random person at this event after we made a ton of tough cuts,” she continued. “I said no, but my stepmom is trying to fight me on it because it’s her daughter and my dad (her husband) that is paying for the event.”
She says she feels her stepsister and stepson are being “selfish” during what is a “tough time for me”.
“Stepsister feels we aren’t considering her feelings and anxiety around the event,” she writes. “I offered to pay for her room, my sister offered to leave her husband at home so she could feel less alone, but the only solution in my stepsisters eyes is that she should be allowed a date.”
She asked if she’s being unreasonable for holding her ground and majority of Reddit users have backed her 100 percent.
“It’s a wedding restricted to close family,” says one. “I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume she’s going to know most of the guests. There will be plenty of people supporting her – and her anxiety isn’t going to improve if she uses it as an excuse to force you to allow her date to attend.”
“To me, it sounds like stepsister is trying to make herself more important in this wedding than she is,” says another. “I suspect that if OP gives in, stepsister will do something else to try to show her importance. Over and over until the wedding is ruined.
“Personally, I’d talk to your dad alone, tell him that she can’t have a guest because it’s not fair to you at YOUR event, and even suggest to him that you would like to tell stepsister if you hear one more word about this that she will be uninvited, and that if she is on anything less than her best behaviour, your bridesmaids will remove her.”
One Reddit user recalls their own wedding and how having a random guest ruined the wedding photos.
“Also they ruin f–king photos,” they say. “My BIL took a date we never even knew her name… she awkwardly posed in all the family photos they took of that table (she isn’t in any of the photos we are in, but still….).”
“She is probably jealous you are getting married and is dying on this hill because of that,” suggests another Reddit user. “This isn’t about her boyfriend coming at all. If she has that much anxiety, then she should just not come.
“Besides, if you allow her a date…shouldn’t you allow your bridesmaids to bring dates too?”
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