Looking for 50 of the best date ideas in San Diego? Look no further. San Diego is home to the beautiful California coastline, a prime destination for surfing at sunrise, whale watching, and taking long romantic walks on the beach. A vibrant city with a diverse dating pool and epic date locations, San Diego is guaranteed to deliver compelling, once-in-a-lifetime, even fairytale-like dates.
Home to over 1.3 million people, San Diego boasts a fun, youthful vibe. The median age is just 33 years old and the male-to-female ratio is nearly even, with 51% of the population being men and 49% being women. Given the average age and close male-to-female ratio, there’s plenty of opportunities to find that special someone.
In this article, we have sourced 50 first, second, and third date ideas from local San Diego matchmakers, dating coaches, socialites, and our friends and family in the area. It’s time to get swept away and invite that special someone out for a fun date in San Diego, California.
Before we jump into these date ideas, let’s first cover the general framework for a successful first, second and third date. If you’re looking for all of the bells and whistles that go into orchestrating an excellent date, I teach the complete blueprint for a first, second, and third date in my Signature program. The framework was derived from my 100-date experiment, where I examined the factors that led to success and failure in dating.
Now, without further adieu, here are my general guidelines for your first, second, and third dates.
First Date
The first date should cost you less than $10 and be scheduled during daylight hours. It needs to be short and sweet to ensure that there’s still a bit of mystery left for her to uncover over the course of future dates. Successful first dates are simple. All you need to do is win her trust and rapport. Once you have that, the first date should end.
When you hit the one hour mark, you have two choices if you want to see her again. The first: you close for the second date on a different day and end the date. The second: you move to a new location and begin the second date on the same day. Either works but you don’t want to stay in the same spot beyond an hour on the first date. Doing so kills sexual tension and leaves you friend-zoned or ghosted later on.
Second Date
This brings me to the second date. Time to get physical! The second date is all about bringing adrenaline into your new relationship. Go on a bike ride, climb a mountain, or take her surfing- if it gets your heart rate up, then this is the time to do it. Make sure your second date also takes place during daylight hours.
Third Date
If you both still like each other by date number three, then you’ve likely built a solid foundation for trust and rapport as well as a little sexual tension. The third date is where the traditional dinner date happens. You want your third dates taking place at night to increase intimacy. She’ll feel as though she’s known you longer if you’ve been to multiple places during the day and at night. Now is when you start to have those deeper, more intimate conversations. By now, spending more time and money won’t be out of sequence, and if things go well, you might be taking her back to your place. Set the stage for a romantic evening and the sky is the limit.
For more information on how to “orchestrate the fairytale” on your dates, check out my Signature Program. In it, I cover many more details about how to plan and sequence your first, second, and third dates. Applying the entire framework of each blueprint can help to attract and sustain a fulfilling relationship with your most ideal partner.
Now, enough about date blueprints and guidelines, let’s get to the good stuff. Below you will find 50 of the best San Diego date ideas sorted into three categories: first, second, and third dates. For those of you living in Coronado, I’ve got you covered as well.
First Date Ideas San Diego
First Date Ideas San Diego #1: Little Lion Cafe
This funky little coffee shop in Ocean Beach is sure to impress with its delicious coffee and nomnomnom-worthy snacks. Try their turmeric latte for a healthy treat, and opt for their locally sourced, organic food if you’re feeling peckish.
-Recommendation by Sammi, San Diego Local
First Date Ideas San Diego #2: Farmer’s Market at Ocean Beach
If you’re tired of coffee dates that feel like interviews, then I challenge you to branch out. Enjoy a stroll around the Farmer’s Market at Ocean Beach on a Wednesday afternoon (4 pm – 8 pm). This location offers a casual setting that will give you time to get to know each other, while also providing an outward focus. Walking through the farmer’s market together can make you feel as though you’ve known each other forever. Dates that are active and have an outward focus create less pressure because you don’t feel the need to fill every silence.
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
First Date Ideas San Diego #3: Holsem Coffee
Holsem, a coffee shop with 18 craft coffee cocktails, is sure to entice even the most fickle women. To mobilize her to say “yes” to a date invitation, ask her if she’s ever had a Cortado coffee with hibiscus petals.
Pro-tip: Menu buzz words work. You don’t need to know exactly what a Cortado with hibiscus petals is. Sell your date idea by using a menu item that sounds epic. Doing this will make her feel as though you are offering her a once-in-a-lifetime experience that she can’t get anywhere else. If she asks for more details, tell her that it’s the world’s most delicious coffee and she has to taste it to believe it. Then TDL her.
The best part is, whether she loves the cortado or not doesn’t matter because taste is subjective. If you want to mobilize a woman to agree to a date, make the date sound epic by using menu buzz words. If the Cortado doesn’t compel her, try enticing her with the Guava Coconut Fizz or the Blueberry Lavender, Lemonade, Cold Brew. There’s no limit to what Holsem will come up with next.
-Recommendation by Sammi, San Diego Local
#4: A Drink Outside the Del Coronado
The Del Coronado Hotel is said to have views comparable to Hawaii. Who said you can’t take your date to a hotel? Maybe don’t get a room just yet, but enjoy a drink and take in the views at the Sun Deck just outside. Although a bit on the pricier side with cocktails around $16, this is sure to be a memorable first date!
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
First Date Ideas San Diego #5: Young Hickory
A coffee shop that also serves beer. Need I say more? A fun, welcoming vibe, Young Hickory focuses on making guests feel welcome. Perfect for a first date.
-Recommendation by Sammi, San Diego Local
#6: Cats & Coffee (First Date) + Cat Yoga (2nd Date)
If she loves felines, The Cat Cafe is a super compelling first date spot in San Diego. This unique coffee shop serves delicious coffee and is home to a variety of adoptable cats that will curl up with the two of you while you get to know each other better over sweet sips and cozy conversation. For a second date with a cat lover, check out their Cats on Mats, a Cat Yoga experience. Whoever thought this up was borderline crazy, borderline genius, I can’t tell which.
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#7: Portal Coffee
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#8: The Baked Bear
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
#9: Better Buzz Coffee
No really, it’s an actual drink at Better Buzz Coffee made with their classic americano and signature creamy vanilla. Why not meet there on Saturday at 2 pm and see if it really is the Best Drink Ever!
-Recommendation by Sammi, San Diego Local
San Diego First Date Ideas #10: Bobboi Natural Gelato
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
#11: Salt & Straw
Wait for her response. If she doesn’t respond in 48 hours, follow it up with, “Salt & Straw created this amazing new ice cream. They blend James Coffee with a warm and woodsy whiskey from Greenbar Distillery and it’s supposed to be life-changing. They’re serving it this Saturday at 2 pm. Want to join me for a taste test?”
If your girl declines, then I’d hard pass on her too because this spot is undoubtedly epic.
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
#12: 85 Degree Bakery
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
#13: Creamistry
If your date says she’s super adventurous, dare her to order the Elvis Presley, an ice cream sundae made with banana ice cream, banana, peanut butter sauce, and candied bacon.
If she’s more of a girly girl, invite her to try the Unicorn, an ice cream dream made with birthday cake ice cream, mini marshmallows, marshmallow cream, and unicorn dust. It’s nothing short of magical, as is Creamistry – one the most compelling date ideas in San Diego.
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapis
First Date Spots San Diego #14: MooTime Creamery
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
#15: Cauldron Ice Cream
Why go traditional? This unique ice cream shop puts a new spin on the old coffee/tea first date in San Diego.
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#16: Somi-Somi
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
Second Date Ideas San Diego
Second Date Ideas San Diego #17: Bike along the path from Mission Beach to Pacific Beach
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#18: Torrey Pines Glider Port
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant at Aspiring Families
Looking for a real adrenaline rush? Although peaceful, FlyTorrey paragliding will definitely push you out of your comfort zone! If you have an adventurous date, then this is an experience she will never forget. This is a more costly date though, costing around $175 for paragliding (per person). Make sure to plan ahead if you decide to go this route and buy tickets in advance. Avoid having a money exchange take place in front of her on a second date.
#19: Surrey Bike Ride On Coronado Island
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
Escape from the usual hustle and bustle and enjoy your time on Coronado, a beautiful island connected to the city of San Diego by a breathtaking skyway bridge. Bonus points if you’re there for sunset. To get there, take a ferry or drive in from San Diego. The ferry is ideal since this 15-minute option is a more peaceful way to escape.
#20: Walk Around the Shops at Bird Rock
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#21: Annie’s Canyon Hike
– Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
Looking for epic, but cheap date ideas in San Diego? Why not show your date a super special hidden gem? Located roughly 20 miles outside of San Diego, this date idea is well worth the drive for thrill-seekers.
Annie’s Canyon was named after a local woman who spearheaded efforts to restore the trail, and we’re sure glad she did. This exciting hike will require you both to squeeze through narrow sandstone passageways, which will boost endorphins and escalate the sexual tension between you.
#22: Take a Hike!
“There are several beautiful hikes in sunny San Diego. Novice hikers? Check out Mission Trails Regional Park, or the Ho Chi Minh Trail down to Blacks Beach for sunset. You might get lucky and catch a dolphin swimming by. Looking for more of a challenge? Check out Potato Chip Rock!”
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
When you live in a place as beautiful and sunny as San Diego, it’s easy to enjoy time outside, year-round! So grab your date and enjoy a fun hike with some killer views.
Second Date Ideas San Diego #23: Sail San Diego
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant
Who doesn’t love time on the water? There is so much incredible marine life in San Diego, and the best way to get up close and personal is to get out there and feel the ocean breeze. Sail San Diego offers a 2 hour sail that’ll cost you about $70 per person, so this is definitely on the costly side. As long as tickets are purchased in advance and not on the date itself, you should be fine. There are several options of trips you can take too, so be sure to plan ahead!
#24: Hiking in Torrey Pines State Reserve
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
Another beautiful hike idea, but the Torrey Pines State Reserve Hike involves more beaches than mountains. Enjoy the scenic California Coastline, and walk hand-in-hand as you breathe in the warm ocean breeze and the rhythmic sound of waves crashing against the shore.
#25: San Diego Safari Park (Formerly Wild Animal Park)
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant
There’s nothing like a day at the Zoo! SD Safari Park is known as one of the best zoos in the world, and although tickets can be a bit pricey ($56/pp, which would fall out of line with my personal second date blueprint), this experience is truly an unforgettable one. Buy tickets in advance to avoid an awkward money exchange in front of your date.
#26: Ride Scooters from Ocean Beach to La Jolla
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
Second Date Ideas San Diego #27: Wine Tasting in Temecula
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant
Maintaining an adventurous vibe, a wine tour is a sure-fire way to win(e) her heart. Stay safe by maintaining the role of DD- taste your wine and spit it out, so that you stay sober and she can enjoy without worrying. You can also book an Uber or Lyft or find wine country tour busses to pop on and off so you both can have a fun, indulgent second date.
#28: Kayak the La Jolla Caves
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
Have an adventure! Let your kayak guide you through crystal clear water, and watch for exciting marine life. Explore the caves and get to know each other from the comfort of your kayak. Grab a tandem kayak for $69 and explore together! Try and buy it in advance of the date so there are no awkward payment moments.
#29: Ride the Roller Coaster at Belmont Park
Pro-Tip: Make sure she isn’t scared of heights before planning this date…
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#30: Stroll through Balboa Park
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
Second Date Spots in San Diego #31: Sunset Hike with Goats
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
Third Date Ideas San Diego
Third Date Ideas San Diego #32: Del Mar Cinepolis
-Recommendation by Azmaira, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant at Aspiring Families
Strolling through the shops is a great way to get close, laugh together, and grab her hand. Ending the night with a romantic movie and dinner? You can’t go wrong! Heads up though, you’ll have to drive about 20 miles outside of San Diego but it’ll be worth it.
Third Date Ideas San Diego #33: Pacific Coast Grill
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant
Take her up the coast a bit to one of the best restaurants she’ll ever eat at. Entice her senses with delicious cocktails, extraordinary food, and a soft ocean breeze.
Third Date Ideas San Diego #34: The Melting Pot
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant
Who doesn’t love a date that revolves around cheese? Fondue is a fun way to get to know all about your date’s favorite food, and don’t skip the chocolate fondue at the end of the night. What’s more romantic than dipping succulent strawberries into gooey, decadent chocolate?
#35: Rooftop Cinema Club at Manchester Grand Hyatt San Diego
-Recommendation by Steven Williams, Local San Diego Musician, Entrepreneur, Photographer, and World Traveler
Expansive, sunset views and a glass of bubbly champagne, create an intimate and seductive mood for a third date. Give her the perfect evening by providing both, and then sweep her away to a divine dinner of your choosing.
#36: Cafe 21 in the Gaslamp
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
#37: Tom Hamm’s
-Recommendation by Preeti Presswala-Shah, LMFT Gottman Trained Couples Therapist
Third Date Spots San Diego #38: Dinner at the Prado, Balboa Park
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
#39: Sea 180
-Recommendation by Steven Williams, Local San Diego Musician, Entrepreneur, Photographer, and World Traveler
A perfect spot for a sunset dinner, Sea 180 offers amazing drinks and great seafood options. Plus, the staff has an incredible reputation, so you can rest easy knowing your date will have a fabulous experience.
#40: Pearl Hotel “Dive in” Movie Night
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#41: Night at San Diego Symphony
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
Third Date Ideas San Diego#42: Tapas at Costa Brava in PB
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#43: Picnic on Sunset Cliffs
-Recommendation by Sammi S., San Diego Local
#44: C Level
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
#45: Cloak and Petal
-Recommendation by Azmaira H. Maker, Clinical Psychologist, Author, and Consultant at Aspiring Families
Third Date Ideas San Diego #46: Farmer’s Bottega
-Recommendation by Lisa Lapides Sawicki, San Diego Life Coach
#47: Illusions Theatre and Bar
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
#48: Starlite
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
#49: Trailer Park After Dark
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
Third Date Ideas San Diego #50: Monzu Fresh Pasta
-Recommendation by EmLovz Staff
Bonus Date Ideas in Tijuana, Mexico
Telefonica Gastro Park
-Recommendation by Steven Williams, Local San Diego Musician, Entrepreneur, Photographer, and World Traveler
Oryx Capital
-Recommendation by Steven Williams, Local San Diego Musician, Entrepreneur, Photographer, and World Traveler
Nativo Coffee
I would recommend walking across at the PedWest border crossing, especially if you don’t have a Sentri pass. If you don’t have a Sentri pass then I would suggest either going on a weekday or plan on crossing back later in the evening on a weekend night when foot traffic is light.
-All Tijuana Recommendations by Steven Williams, Local San Diego Musician, Entrepreneur, Photographer, and World Traveler
Date Ideas San Diego: Conclusion
San Diego is one of the most beautiful places on earth. As such, there’s no excuse for not having an exceptional dating experience. That’s not to say that dating, in general, is the easiest thing. After all, dating isn’t taught in school. If you didn’t have stellar role models to learn from, it can be hard to know what to do and what not to do. That’s where I come in.
I can help you fill up your dating funnel with tons of high-quality women so you can go to all of these different date locations with awesome women. But dating isn’t just about choosing the right location, there’s a lot more to it than that. That said, you’ve got a solid list of epic date locations now, so you’re on the path to finding a fulfilling relationship with a woman who drives you wild.
If you’d like to discuss more in-depth dating strategies, let’s talk. You can book a new client session with me here or check out my webinar to learn more about my dating philosophy. Either way, there’s a lot to be excited about if you’re dating in San Diego. Make your single life fun and fulfilling, it can be a life-altering adventure that you’ll never forget–if you let it.