AN EVIL Tinder date who sexually abused and urinated on a woman smirked at her from the dock as he was jailed for seven years.
Vile Wesley Spalding, 32, met his victim on the dating app before launching a campaign of abuse against her.
This week, he leered at her as she bravely read aloud a victim impact statement after he was convicted of a series of charges against her.
The woman, who can’t be named, told a judge: “I’d worked hard and was renting my own house.
“I had worked hard on my confidence.
“Only now I can see I was the perfect target.
“He seemed so caring and so thoughtful. His manipulation impaired my judgement.
“It didn’t take long to go back to a shadow of my former self.”
She said Spalding subjected her to “mental torment”, playing loud music throughout the night to keep her awake, sexually assaulting her as she slept, and even urinating on her.
“I was sleep deprived and that kept me in a state of confusion,” she said.
“He did things so painful I was embarrassed to tell people.
“I felt like I was a pressure cooker. What was a dream is now a nightmare.
“I battle on a daily basis.”
Spalding, of Coventry, was found guilty of assault by penetration, attempted assault by penetration, two counts of sexual assault and two of coercive and controlling behaviour following a week-long trial at Hull Crown Court.
The thug already has five previous convictions for seven offences, including criminal damage and the harassment of an ex.
Claire Holmes, mitigating for the defendant, told the court the victim was “not particularly vulnerable” – despite the fact she was naked and sleeping when Spalding assaulted her.
How you can get help
Women’s Aid has this advice for victims and their families:
- Always keep your phone nearby.
- Get in touch with charities for help, including the Women’s Aid live chat helpline and services such as SupportLine.
- If you are in danger, call 999.
- Familiarise yourself with the Silent Solution, reporting abuse without speaking down the phone, instead dialing “55”.
- Always keep some money on you, including change for a pay phone or bus fare.
- If you suspect your partner is about to attack you, try to go to a lower-risk area of the house – for example, where there is a way out and access to a telephone.
- Avoid the kitchen and garage, where there are likely to be knives or other weapons. Avoid rooms where you might become trapped, such as the bathroom, or where you might be shut into a cupboard or other small space.
If you are a victim of domestic abuse, SupportLine is open Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday from 6pm to 8pm on 01708 765200. The charity’s email support service is open weekdays and weekends during the crisis – firstname.lastname@example.org.
Women’s Aid provides a live chat service available. from 10am to noon.
You can also call the freephone 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247.
“She has the support of her friends, she has her own friends and she has been able to return to work,” she said.
“This defendant had his own vulnerabilities. There is reference to his depression and the loss of his job, but that is no excuse for this type of behaviour.”
Spalding smiled as a judge told him he had inflicted “sexual, physical and emotional abuse” on his victim.
“You deprived her of sleep. You weren’t doing it for your own sexual gratification, but to exert power over her,” the judge said.
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“You urinated on her, which was extremely humiliating and degrading.
“There was an occasion where you threatened her with violence.
“You have shown to be a manipulator.”