Flea-bagging, yellow carding, and other dating pitfalls to avoid in 2020 | #facebookdating | #tinder | #pof

We all know dating can be hard, despite what the movies tell us about meet cutes on trains and in supermarkets.

If you’ve tried online dating, you’ll know all the buzzwords that go with it.

For example: breadcrumbing – leading someone on with no intention of replying, dogfishing – pretending to have a pet to lure in canine lovers, and what might be the oldest trick in the book, Gatsbying – dating purely to post a photo of it on social media to ensure your ex gets jealous.

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As if the old terms weren’t bad enough, there are a bunch of new ones to get familiar with for dating in 2020 – like eclipsing, fleabagging and being glamboozled, according to the Mirror.

Here’s some quick definitions:


Flea-bagging is going for people who might not be right for you. Photo / 123rf

Consistently going after people who are wrong for you – think a hot priest.

Half of singles say they’re guilty of fleabagging, but more women than men tend to admit it.

Dial toning

When someone gives you their number and tells you to message them, but doesn’t respond to your texts.

Over 60 per cent of singles say they’ve experienced this at some point – who hasn’t?


Reconnecting with an ex to ask a favour – usually something to do with charity, like asking them to donate to your fun run.

People in their early 40s tend to be the most guilty of this – a quarter admitted to having done it in the past.

Reconnecting with an ex to ask a favour is becoming more common. Photo / 123rf


Developing a sudden interest in the same hobbies as the person you’re dating, to find common ground with them.

Over 30 per cent of singles say someone they’ve dated has suddenly become interested in their hobbies and passions.


When your partner’s ex continually tries to contact you on social media or through other channels.

Twenty-two per cent of people have experienced this, but only six per cent admitted to actually being this ex.

Yellow carding

According to the experts, this is going to be big in 2020 – telling someone you’re on a date with that you’re not happy with their poor dating ettiquette.

Women are more confident to call someone out, at 28 per cent, compared to only 12 per cent of men being willing to “yellow card” someone.

There’s a word for when you get all dressed up only for a date to fall through – it’s “glamboozled”. Photo / 123rf


This might be the worst date trend of them all – when you spend hours getting ready for an evening out, makeup, hair, carefully chosen outfit – only for your date to cancel on you at the last minute.

Over 50 per cent of people have had dates cancelled at the last minute – and it happens to women more frequently than to men, at 60 per cent compared to 48 per cent.

But Plenty of Fish head of PR Shannon Smith says some of these additions are positive.

“Dating is changing, and our annual trends survey reflects what singles will and won’t accept from their partners,” she says.

“More than ever, singles feel empowered to have honest discussions about what behaviour is and isn’t acceptable, and are being open about the things they’re looking for.”

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