Gary Behrman, a 45 year old white male who lives in Olathe, Kansas and works at a shingle supply company in Merriam lists himself on POF.com as a dad of two girls and one son. His profile talks about his honesty, his desire to actively find a nice woman for a long term relationship, what a romantic gentleman he is, and even asks that no one play games with him. His pictures all feature him with his kids, which adds to the innocent feel of his profile. Gary contacted me the fist week I joined POF. His message was very sweet and prompted me to look at his profile. Like many attractive women on these sites, I received hundreds of messages in a short time, but Gary seemed very sincere and we started messaging on a regular basis. He was never inappropriate and was very patient as I spent over two months just talking on the site before finally giving him my number, after which we talked and texted daily. I lived two hours from Gary and about three weeks after getting my number he asked if it would be ok if he drove down to see me, to me this was another indication of his sincerity. When I said it was such a long way to come for a woman he’d never met, he said he’d go ten times that far because he had a huge crush on me and wanted a chance to be the man in my life. When we met there was an instant connection, probably helped by the months spent getting to know him. He had gotten a room at the most expensive hotel in town so he could see me again the next day. He was sweet, shy, respectful, and I was hooked. We decided we wanted to see each other exclusively before he left and he invited me to travel to his town the following weekend and stay at his place. Every night he called and talked about how much he liked me, and how “smitten” he was. I traveled to see him as we had agreed, and we became lovers despite me feeling it was too soon. He introduced me to his son, telling me he had never done that before and that he also had never asked a woman to his home before. When it came time for me to go home he pleaded with me to stay and find work in his area so we could be together. I told Gary this was all too fast, but he convinced me it was what he wanted, and sadly, I bit. That Monday I went on POF to update and hide my profile. While doing this I noticed Gary was also on. I assumed he was doing the same as I, so said nothing when he got home. Over the week I noticed things about Gary that were concerning. The displays of affection and gentleman like behavior had disappeared. He had told me he hadn’t dated in years, but one night he received a text from a woman and admitted he had seen her for about a week before me and had been in a sexual relationship. He also said he had simply stopped talking to her with no explanation. Over time he admitted to having had many similar brief relationships through POF, but I was different, he claimed. I was concerned after hearing the truth that the man was not what he had presented and went on POF to make sure his profile was hidden. Not only was it not, he was online again. I said nothing and continued to monitor over the next week. He was on here and there throughout the day, usually within an hour of leaving me in bed to go to work. When I finally asked him about it he claimed the site was blocked at work and so it must be a glitch. I began noticing this “glitch” did not happen when he was with me, only when he was at work. I again told Gary his profile showed him as being online and perhaps he should at least hide it as I had done. He said he would do that the next day “from work!”. I didn’t point out he had told me he couldn’t get on there; it was just one more lie to add to the mounting lies. Gary began going outside when he received phone calls, and suddenly kept his phone locked or in his pocket at all times. My fears that I was being lied to and used became too much for me to take. One day about an hour after he left for work I checked POF and say that he was on. I quickly created a profile using my little sisters pictures and sent him a brief message simply saying I like his profile. I waited, hoping there would be no response, but within a couple hours he replied he’d be interested in getting to know me. After a couple messages he suggested meeting, and it was then I revealed it was me. When he got home he admitted he had been on all the times I’d caught him, he had become addicted, but this was the first time he had talked to anyone. He asked my forgiveness and said he would delete his profile if I gave him another chance because he didn’t want to lose me. I agreed but told him he would need to earn my trust again after so many lies. I told him I was going to go home and would be back the following weekend. I called when I got there to let him know I’d arrived safe and he thanked me for giving him another chance. I checked POF hoping he would have deleted his account and I couldn’t find him, but his messages in my inbox were also gone. My sister got on her account and found him. He was online and had deleted me. I played dumb and messaged him, and received no response. I haven’t heard from the jerk since, though he is rarely off the site as he lines up his next victims.
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