“My life feels in danger at this point because of something online.”
SCOTTSDALE, AZ (3TV/CBS5) – It started with emails and messages to Cynthia Sassi’s business. Then, there was a phone call to her apartment complex. “The person threatened to show up,” Sassi said. Someone really wanted to find her. “I was in such a fluster trying to figure out what was going on; I just called them right away,” she said. A confounding conversation ensued. “He said, ‘Is your boyfriend’s name Eric?'” Sassi recalled. “I said, ‘No,’ and he says, ‘Yes, your boyfriend’s name is Eric. I’m Eric. You’re dating me.'”
“Now, I’m scared to post on social media. I’m scared to go home,” Cynthia Sassi said.
Stolen identity and catfishing
The man on the other end of the phone call claimed he and Sassi had been messaging back and forth regularly. “He’s like, ‘We’ve been talking for four months, and we’ve been dating, and I flew down here to Scottsdale from New York today to see you.'”
The man sent screenshots of the supposed conversations, and Sassi quickly realized a scam artist had stolen her photos from social media posts and used them in a catfishing scheme to lure the man from New York, a man who thought he was in love. Whoever the man had been communicating with stopped responding when he landed in Arizona.
Over the past decade, Sassi has built a business, Fabulous Media Group, which relies on social media. Her photos and her experiences help sell her brand. “That’s my business. That’s my livelihood,” she told 3 On Your Side. “Now, I’m scared to post on social media. I’m scared to go home.” Sassi doesn’t know what the man from New York looks like or his true identity. She says he has flooded her cell phone with calls and messages from multiple untraceable numbers.
“I’m scared.”
“Some of his initial messages were around money, as well, that I had scammed him and stolen money from him, so I’m assuming he also sent money to the person,” Sassi said. “Obviously, his anger is misdirected to be coming at me, and I think he isn’t fully accepting that it’s not me.”
A common scam
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Catfishing scams are incredibly common, according to Adam Levin, a cybersecurity expert and co-host of the podcast “What the Hack.” “We’re talking about multi, multi hundreds of millions of dollars, if not billions of dollars, worldwide,” he told 3 On Your Side.
“There’s no question, once you’re out there, you’re out there, and if someone wants to use whatever you’ve provided for their benefit, they will,” says Adam Levin, a cybersecurity expert and co-host of the podcast “What the Hack.”
In this type of imposter or romance scam, there are two distinct victims — the one who is falling for it and sending money or personal information and the person whose identity is being used. “There’s no question, once you’re out there, you’re out there, and if someone wants to use whatever you’ve provided for their benefit, they will,” Levin said. “That’s why it’s so important that you lock down your privacy settings.”
Because of her business, Sassi can’t do that, but she is being more cautious about what photos and information she posts and when she posts it. She also filed a report with the Scottsdale Police Department. “My life feels in danger at this point because of something online,” she said. “These things do have the ability to come offline and hurt people.”
That’s why Sassi actually feels sympathy for the man from New York. “He sounded broken-hearted and upset, which I feel bad about,” she said. “It does make me sick, thinking every time I post something, it could be taken to scam somebody or hurt somebody.”
According to the Federal Trade Commission, people reported losing $547 million to romance scams in 2021, a sharp increase from the previous year. The agency says the median loss was $2,400.
Telltale signs of a romance scam
“If someone comes on too fast, too strong, and it doesn’t make sense, be very careful,” Levin said. “If, for whatever reason, they can never seem to meet you or there’s always a crisis, those should be red flags, as well,” Levine said.
“Romance scammers create fake profiles on dating sites and apps, or contact their targets through popular social media sites like Instagram, Facebook, or Google Hangouts,” the FTC says. “The scammers strike up a relationship with their targets to build their trust, sometimes talking or chatting several times a day.” Scammers often claim they are living or traveling outside the U.S., working on an oil rig, in the military, or a doctor with an international organization. That’s why they cannot meet. That’s also is why they often need money — to pay for a plane ticket, travel documents, or cover a customs fee. Supposed emergency medical needs and gambling debts are other reasons they might need to “borrow” money. Levine said that request for money is the biggest warning sign of a scam.
“The minute they start asking for credit card information, gift cards, financial information, say no — and run.”
What to do
If you think you are or have been the target of a romance scam, report it to the FTC and the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3). If you used a gift card to give a scammer money, contact the company and tell them what happened. You might be able to get at least some of your money back.
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