The Netflix documentary The Tinder Swindler relates the story of Simon Leviev, who meets women on the popular dating app, fosters relationships with them, and subsequently cons them out of large sums of money. It represents an extreme case of what the FBI terms romance scams and falls under the umbrella of what scientists call catfishing.
Catfishing involves using a fake identity online to foster romantic relationships; romance scammers use this false persona to exploit their victims financially. Over the past several years, I’ve collected data from more than 1000 people who have experienced this phenomenon as a victim, perpetrator, or both, and my research reveals patterns that were exhibited in The Tinder Swindler. (If you have experienced catfishing as a victim or perpetrator and are interested in taking part in a study about your experience, please click here.)
Here, I summarize a few key findings from my research.
Women. The documentary is consistent with my research: Women are more likely than men to become catfishing victims. Potentially, this is because compared to men, women are more relationally-oriented, socialized toward caring for others, and desiring of the fairytale or dream romance. This doesn’t mean men aren’t relational or that women don’t catfish; it just means women are more commonly catfish victims.
For various reasons, some people are not successful in relationships, and this puts them at risk of being scammed. The history of difficulty may stem from childhood (e.g., bad parenting) or low-quality adult relationships, but either way these individuals are vulnerable to victimization. When a “partner” requests favors or breaks promises, those with a negative relationship history are inclined to remain committed and indulge the swindler, rather than breaking it off.
People high in dark personality traits such as narcissism and psychopathy are more likely to perpetrate romance scams. These individuals lack empathy, lie for self-gain, and manipulate others. Narcissists are especially charming in the initial phases of a relationship, which hooks the target, but once the hook is in, control and exploitation ensue.
In addition to a dark personality, the person’s level of attractiveness also predicts perpetration. Some people are especially sought after as romantic partners, but this is not the case for catfish perpetrators. Consider the case of The Tinder Swindler: By objective dating standards, he was not that appealing—not the best-looking, lacking money and status, and without a caring personality. So, he faked it. People who do not espouse desirable relationship features more often pretend to be someone they are not.
My research has examined ways to protect from this type of relationship. Here are my main recommendations.
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