Surely you have asked yourself this question before: how to be single?
No? You haven’t? The reason for that is probably because you are more focused on being in a relationship than being single. Whether it is all those #cutecouple or #couplegoals pictures that pop up on your feed, or maybe the posts about your friends getting married, or even just your close (or distant) family members constantly asking you about a significant other… the whole world makes us believe that we NEED to be in a relationship.
Being single is a big part of everybody’s life. It is a period of time we have to learn about ourselves. We better use it to build good relationships on our own. We need to learn many valuable lessons and ultimately create value for ourselves, for our own sake.
This value is important because it is our self-worth. It is what makes people attracted to us. Simply put: being single is an advantage you have right now but you are wasting it. Being single is extremely common, and you are not alone.
How to be single: Let’s break down a few, simple steps on how to be single, take advantage of it and how not to be single anymore.
I was partly inspired by a great YouTube video from Matthew Hussey and his guest Lewis Howes – if you heard either of those names before, you know this is going to be good.
The other part that provoked my thought is purely personal experience. The beautiful thing about this is that no matter what your personal circumstance is, once you apply this advice on how to be single (the right way), you are bound to experience a positive change in your life. At least to some degree, I can guarantee this (it worked wonders for me).
Make yourself attractive for others
No, it does not mean looks and physical attributes only. Although I will go ahead and highlight that keeping yourself fit, groomed, healthy is a crucial attractiveness factor. Generally, you want to feel your best. Take this time to get plenty of exercise, maintain a good diet, go out often, etc. There is nothing more attractive than a person who feels good in their own skin.
This will naturally lead to having interesting hobbies and filling your spare time with activities that are important to you. When figuring out how to be single and happy, try new things. Take new classes at your gym, or join in various groups to find new interests. It is convenient and combines two things – trying out something new and finding new places and ways of meeting new people!
Having done something new and exciting you will have much more experience. This experience makes you an interesting person. It lets you talk about different things with whoever you might meet – it increases your personal value. Personal value is not only important in dating, but in building wider networks generally.
“You attract people when you’re living your best life” – Lewis Howes
The above point ensures that you stay busy in your personal life. There is so many things out there that you could be doing, so many people to meet, so many experiences to be had. Live your best life and don’t wait around for someone to want to join you.
Think about it, when someone sees you enjoying yourself and enjoying your own company, they will be curious about what you are doing. What is it that is making you happy and how could they join in on your fun? As Matt said in this video “men want to be with women they have to convince to have a relationship with, not women they have to save”.
Arguably, this applies to the opposite scenario too. Women also want men who are driven and are out to do amazing things (big or small, just have a goal and be passionate about it!). Nobody goes out there looking for a partner that is going to be dependent 110% of the time.
How to be single means to stop caring about getting into a relationship
Obsessing over something is rarely a constructive way forward. In fact, obsessing over something very, very bad, often leads you the opposite direction to where you want to go. That’s why, this advice on how to be single sounds a little counter-intuitive. Stop caring about getting into a relationship!
‘How to be single’ the right way means being single and that is it. You don’t wish to have a relationship, you don’t wish to have a love partner. All you do, is openly and freely meet people for the sake of meeting people and making friends (which has been proven to increase your happiness).
Being sad because you are single is not attractive. Equally, feeling sad and sorry for yourself is not attractive. Remember: nobody wants to get into a relationship with a black hole (sad single person) who just sits at home and sucks the life out of you!
If you are going through a rough patch at the moment, either because you recently got out of a relationship or other personal circumstances, the above tips are generally a good way to increase your happiness. There are important things in life that you can enjoy without a partner.
Make sure to invest time and energy into your other relationships. These likely got a bit dusty over the course of your relationship. Don’t forget about your family and your old friends who must be keen to spend some quality time with you again!
If you are going to take away one thing about how to be single, I want it to be this: Figure out a way to meet new people. I am not saying you need to go on 5 dates a week, I am not even saying you need to go on dates full stop. Just try to adjust your focus a little bit. Maybe start small by aiming to just meet people, saying hello to them. Try to start conversations with people that you don’t usually speak to.
You will be amazed at the impact that this can have in your personal and in your love life.
Alternatively, a great way to meet people (and it can be very fun!) is by signing up to Luxy. Make an online dating profile on Luxy here!
I cannot force you to obey by any of these ‘how to be single’ tips. What I can do is share more tips and tricks on how to be single until you are not. What can you do? Try out different things in your personal life. These tips and tricks should help you figure out what it is that you need to do – don’t do everything just because it says so in the article.
Since you are here, I might as well tell you to follow our blog because we share much more dating advice and tips on how to get yourself the significant other with our app – LUXY! Like this Dating Advice for all of you out there who are ready and looking for dates!
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