By the time it was March, all of us were faced with the reality of a pandemic and even lockdown. During a
Many young people are struggling with this new reality. While so many of them are adapting to the fact that this year will be a wipeout of sorts, they are also worried that the rules of dating have changed. Their anxiety, fears are valid because in reality none of us have any existing templates about how to navigate
In the beginning of this year,
Over the past few years, dating as a process has changed massively where with technology, we could easily meet prospective partners, get to know so much about their jobs, political preferences, hobbies and sometimes after a couple of conversations online, even meet them in person. In my book,
It has made it clear that our old dating patterns allowed for a certain immediacy and swiftness. However, the current times possibly require a different pacing. Also, as some of my clients and friends have been sharing, possibly now they would get to know the other person, their views, values and even intellectual perspectives before they can meet them in person. I feel that right now both men and women are having deeper conversations about their fears, vulnerabilities and have even begun to reexamine what commitment means to them. As
Tricky terrains like what to wear for a date, the restaurant that one must pick and even the difficult conversation about intimacy is now parked for a long time, till two people feel comfortable to even go on a socially distanced date. Yet, the anxieties persist about when one can actually meet a partner and a helplessness about the year passing by. The pandemic has been a big test of our resilience and adaptive capacity; may be our lens of intimacy will require that too.
This is the third article in the series.