The worst dating terms that defined the 2010s | #facebookdating | #tinder | #pof


_________________________

This decade was a doozy for dating.

We’ve been dumped, lied to, bamboozled — and worst of all, we’ve been ghosted.

Each generation surely has its own romance woes. But as we come upon the end of the 2010s, we find ourselves reflecting on the truly awful ways dating found meaning in this decade, when social media turned heartbreak into hashtags.

Increasingly more absurd phrases were coined to explain each and every terrible possible occurrence that came to define dating between 2010 and 2019.

Dating was a different game in 2010. Facebook was new, and online dating was still in its infancy — Tinder didn’t come onto the scene until 2012. If you wanted to end things with someone you were seeing, you had to tell them, directly, and not slowly drift away. The horror!

If the past decade in love has your head and heart spinning, here’s a glossary for reference — and old time’s sake.

DTR

Verb — to define the relationship

MTV’s “Awkward” popularized this abbreviation in 2011, when the teens on the show were hooking up and messing with each other’s feelings: was it just sex or something more? Yes, there came a time in any relationship when it was clear both parties liked one another — perhaps one could even say “going steady.” But the exact title of “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” had not been established. This was when one needed to DTR, and have a conversation about what’s going on. Time was of the essence in 2011!

Cougar

Noun — an older woman who dates a younger man

See: Kate Beckinsale, Demi Moore, Madonna, Wendy Williams. First added to the dictionary in 2011, “cougar” became a mainstay of our vernacular with shows such as “Cougar Town,” starring Courteney Cox.

But, as the decade became gradually more woke, the term lost its staying power after the romance of Beckinsale, 46, and Pete Davidson, 26.

As The Post wrote when their relationship blossomed, the term “cougar” officially became “a vestige of a deeply misogynistic past.”

Bromance

Noun — when two men love each other in a non-romantic way

This term was created by presumably insecure straight men to use when they want to show their affection to another man, but they don’t want anyone to think they’re gay. Though this term was floated before the decade’s start, it was rightfully added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2011. Buddy comedies, such as “21 Jump Street” and “Horrible Bosses,” helped stamp the phrase into the zeitgeist. Even former President Barack Obama and his VP Joe Biden’s friendship has been called a bromance.

Friendships that might have previously gone the way of a “bromance” have evolved — actor Oscar Isaac recently mused that his “Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker” character Poe could have perhaps been more than a bromance with John Boyega’s character, Finn.

“If they would’ve been boyfriends, that would have been fun,” Isaac said during a recent junket. Bromance is dead. Long live space boyfriends.

Swipe

Verb — to select a match option on a dating app 

First, there was Tinder. Then came Bumble and Hinge and Grindr and Coffee Meets Bagel and all the rest. Swipe right to match with someone, swipe left to pass. With one fell finger motion, the world became a much more complicated place than the Craigslist personals page. Now, with every single hottie in the world available at their fingertips, daters are getting tired of the selection process. Worried that they’re swiping past “the one,” people are swiping right on just about anyone who seems palatable and are feeling fatigued over the lack of success.

Enthusiastic consent

Noun — unquestionable agreement to sexual interaction, necessary to have any sort of sexual interaction 

Yes, there are funny dating terms. But this decade also brought an important discussion of consent in the midst of high profile rape cases, such as Stanford’s Brock Turner. Necessarily, colleges began to talk more about how important it is for partners to verbalize their agreement with one another before partaking in anything sexual together. And thus the term “enthusiastic consent” was born — clunky, but needed. “If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no,” was echoed by resident advisers through the hallways of dorms everywhere.

Cuffing season

Noun — the time period between October and March when people settle down into committed relationships 

Who wants to be single for the holidays? Cuffing, which takes its name from handcuffs, is a winter dating phenomenon. For some, it’s about avoiding the age-old “where’s your boyfriend?” question during the holidays. Others just seek a warm body during the cold months. Matchmaker Amy Van Doran put it this way in a recent Post article on the matter: “We’re physically cold in the winter, so it’s that time to slow down,” she says. “You don’t want to be putting on your high heels and going to the club. You want to be getting delivery food.”

Catfish

Verb — to trick someone through a false online persona. Noun — a fake online persona

Spawned by the hit documentary reality show “Catfish,” the term came to haunt online dating this decade. In 2012,  then-Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te’o thought he was in an online relationship with Lennay Kekua, a woman who suddenly died from leukemia. It turned out that he was catfished, and instead had been speaking with a male trickster, Ronaiah Tuiasosopo.

A lesson was born: Don’t get in an online relationship with someone you haven’t video chatted with, or who hasn’t proved to be who they say they are.

Revenge porn

Noun — sexts posted online as a form of blackmail without the consent of the person who originally sent them

With sexting came its dark criminal side, now illegal in New York and several other states. In 2017, Rob Kardashian posted nude photos of his recent ex, Blac Chyna, after she allegedly cheated on him.

Ghosting

Verb — to break up with someone by ignoring them

The term boomed in 2015, when it was reported that Charlize Theron said she broke up with Sean Penn by ignoring his calls and texts, a rumor she denies. This incredibly disrespectful act has become so popular that offshoots of ghosting now exist, to specify which form of conflict avoidance one is partaking in. See also: “trickle ghosting,” or the act of suddenly stopping communication with someone, only to come back into their lives every now and then to lead them on. Or, “cloaking,” meaning to stand someone up on a date set up on a dating app, and then block all contact with that person on the app.

Sliding into DMs

Verb — getting in touch with someone to flirt via the direct messaging function on Twitter or Instagram

If it’s after midnight and you’re sliding through direct messages like an Olympic figure skater, something is about to go down. Many a romance has been struck in this matter, including one of the decade’s greatest love stories, Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner. And Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra. If two Jonas brothers are doing it, you know it’s here to stay.

Netflix and chill

Verb — to invite someone over under the guise of streaming shows together, with the intention of spending the day hooking up

We can chalk this trend up to the internet. In 2015, Tweeters flooded social media with jokes about their favorite makeout play.

Orbiting

Noun — when a person who ghosted you continues to publicly interact with you on social media

It was 2018’s answer to “ghosting,” only, instead of totally falling off the face of the Earth, this tactic goes an extra, hellish step further by offering glimmers of appearances through social media. Yes, your ex may be gone, but he’ll never be forgotten — especially since he keeps “liking” those selfies you’ve been posting.

:peach:

Emojis

Noun — symbols for male genitalia and butts 

By the end of this grueling decade, we may have lost our ability to verbally communicate. Instead, emojis stand in for words implicating sex. Eggplants and peaches carry sexual tension in every text. Don’t pretend you didn’t know: even Facebook is banning the use of these guys. Use them wisely.


Source link


_________________________