About three out of 10 adults say they have used an online dating platform, according to research from the Pew Research Center. It’s become a common way to find long-term partners, and 44% of dating platform users cite that as a reason they decided to date online.
But, online dating doesn’t come risk-free.
People can be catfished or conned out of thousands of dollars through things like romance scams.
What is a romance scam?
Romance scams, according to the FBI, occur “when a criminal adopts a fake online identity to gain a victim’s affection and trust.”
The person then manipulates the victim into fostering a relationship with them, only to steal their money.
A reformed scammer’s story
Chistopher Maxwell from Nigeria started romance scamming in 2016. He was in his second year of university and did it because he wanted to make money like other people he knew.
“Scamming is common in Nigeria,” he said. “You see people doing it, making money from it.”
He started by obtaining pictures of men in the military, using photos of them in uniform to create fake profiles on social media sites and dating apps. Maxwell said women would be attracted to the profiles and strike up a conversation.
“Once we go into a relationship, boom,” he said. “I have access to them, and they can give me money whenever I want.”
To advance the scam to the next stage, Maxwell would say he wanted to meet in person. The woman would agree and then two days before the visit, Maxwell would announce he had to go to Washington, D.C. — and that once he got there, he would be deployed.
“So automatically, she knows that I will not be able to access my money,” he said. “And I need money, because I’ll be staying on deployment for maybe a year or two years.”
The most money Maxwell received from one victim was $30,000. That same victim would be the one who forever changed his life, urging him to stop being a scammer.
After sending the money, the scam victim realized that Maxwell was never “coming home.” She became ill, depressed and wasn’t able to visit her grandchildren.
“I made her life so miserable, and I was enjoying the [things] she gave me,” he said. “At some point I started feeling bad because … she really wants to know who I am.”
Although nervous, Maxwell eventually got on a video call with the woman and showed his face. She cried a lot, he said, and then told him that he needed to stop scamming people. She introduced him to Social Catfish, a company that verifies online identities using reverse search technology.
“She was so caring,” he said. “She was so patient. She did not want any of the money she gave me, she did not want any of it back … She just wants me to stop scamming and have a good life.”
Now, Maxwell works as a consultant for Social Catfish to help raise awareness about these topics.
Former player share tips on how to avoid romance scams
- Have a video call so you can see the other person’s face before making any relationship decisions
- If they refuse a call and there’s no other way to meet, it’s most-likely a scam
- Go on a physical date with someone
- Be especially alert of profiles with military men because they could be fake
The Indiana Cybersecurity Hub also lists tips on its romance scam blog post:
- Write down any identifiable information of the person
- File a police report
- Report the scam to the Federal Trade Commission and the FBI
Report the incident on the Indiana Cybersecurity Hub’s “Report a Cyber Incident” page.