Wisconsin woman loses over $500,000 to romance scam | #femalescammers

MADISON, Wis. — Romance scams are among the world’s fastest-growing frauds.

According to Nasdaq Verafrin, a financial crime management company, in 2023, $3.8 billion was lost to romance scams and other confidence schemes.

One Wisconsin woman recently lost the fourth-largest amount of money in the U.S. to a romance scam. 

Kathy Stephens spent most of her life in a loving relationship. 

“We had each other, we were close,” said Stephens. “I mean, any marriage is going to have its ups and downs, but we were very close because we were it,” said Stephens. 

Kathy Stephens is not her real name. Spectrum News has changed her name to hide her identity and to protect her privacy. 

Stephens said she and her husband did everything together. After decades of being married, her husband passed away because of health issues, leaving her alone. 

“It was six months before I realized I was in shock and you don’t realize it while you are in it until after you start coming away from it,” said Stephens. 

So, she turned to dating applications to try to fill the void. 

“I just wanted someone to talk to. I had a man in my life for many, many years,” said Stephens. “I knew I wasn’t done grieving my husband, but I felt I was ready to start meeting people.”

Stephens said it did not take long for her to find someone that she felt she really connected with.

“We just kept talking and everyday it was what are you having for breakfast and how are you and you know things to build a relationship so you feel comfortable with that person,” said Stephens. 

The man Stephens had met was Italian and Australian. He was a scuba diver on an oil rig and owned a condo in Florida. He also said he rented an apartment in Wisconsin. 

“I went to the address where he said he was renting an apartment, but there were no mailboxes with names. You had to go inside to get your mail,” said Stephens. 

At one point, she had even got on a video call with the man. 

“He looked just like the guy in all of the pictures, the international model,” said Stephens. “He had a wide-brimmed hat and an umbrella, and he turned around to show he was not fake and he was real.” 

A month into speaking with this man, Stephens said he started asking for money, saying there was an explosion on his oil rig. 

“He said I need it to pay for the helicopter to get off this rig and then I can come meet you,” said Stephens. “After the first explosion, the money was sent for the new machine; he sent a video of the helicopter arriving with the machine hanging on a chain underneath to drop on the rig.”

Stephens even called the police near the oil rig to alert them of the explosion and then made calls to the U.S. Coast Guard. 

The requests for money kept coming, and it took some time for Stephens to realize that she was being scammed. By the time she realized it, it was too late. 

“I was debt free [before I met this man] and I had mortgaged my home, put loans on my cars. That was the last money was my cars,” said Stephens.

The manipulation went on for seven months and Stephens had given this man over $500,000 dollars. 

“I had nothing left. I had everything to live for, and I had nothing left and there was no way to come back in my lifetime,” said Stephens. “A thought just came, and I said ‘yeah, I think I’ll commit suicide.’” 

According to CybSafe, only 55% of romance scams get reported to law enforcement. Many people, like Stephens, choose not to tell anyone they have been scammed out of fear of being judged and ridiculed. 

Stephens said she eventually got the courage to go to the police. That’s when she started working with the Dane County Sheriff, the FBI and the internet Crime Complaint Center. 

Detective Gwen Ruppert and Detective Michelle Viney with the Dane County Sheriff said romance scams like the one that affected Stephen’s life are not uncommon. 

“You have seen the main character in different roles in different movies. They are really good at taking on a persona, learning a script and convincing you that this is who they are,” said Detective Viney. “That is what scammers do. They are making billions off of trusting Americans, so it is worth their time to invest in training, learning script and getting good at this.” 

Detective Ruppert said the most important thing you can do to prevent yourself from being scammed is to talk to someone you trust about the situation. 

“You don’t need to rush with any of this, talk this over with a trusted family friend and then maybe decide,” said Detective Ruppert. “That is part of what the scammers are doing is putting pressure on and creating urgency with the situation.”

Stephens’ scammer is believed to be from Nigeria, which is out of the Dane County Sheriff’s jurisdiction.  

“For the most part we’re basically looking at this like if you are calling us because you have been scammed, you are probably not getting your money back,” said Detective Ruppert.

The scammers contacting U.S. citizens are often victims of human trafficking and are being forced to make these calls. 

Hunter McNeal is a Medical supply logistics manager for The Free Burma Rangers which is a multi-ethnic humanitarian service movement working to bring help, hope and love to people in the conflict zones of Burma, Iraq, and Sudan. 

McNeal and his team live in Chang Mai Thailand and travel to Myanmar or Burma to rescue people from dangerous situations. 

He said the people working in scam centers are almost always victims of human trafficking and being held against their will. 

“They are being trafficked into those scam centers,” said McNeal. “People are offered great jobs and then they are stuck in there and forced to scam people.”

In February of this year, thousands of people were freed from scam compounds in Myanmar.

McNeal said he and his team works with local governments to not only free these people from the scam centers but to help them get a brand-new start at life. 

“So, it is not like people are doing this out of, I just want to get rich quick so I am going to scam people, this is like they were promised one thing and then bait and switch now you are stuck in this place, no passport,” said McNeal. 

As for Stephens, she had planned to retire soon and live off her savings.

With all of her money gone, she will be forced to work much longer than expected and she said she is still trying to recover emotionally from everything she went through. 

“This has left me with the inability to trust anyone,” said Stephens. “How dare they take my trust? You don’t think about it until it is stolen from you.”

This story mentions suicide. If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, you can call or text 988. For more resources, click here.