Romance fraud, like the crimes featured in the Netflix documentary Tinder Swindler, is costing Leicestershire people nearly a million pounds a year.
And that’s just counting the victims who actually turn to police after falling for the lies of their online loves.
In one recent case, a 43-year-old Leicestershire woman fell in love with a man she met online only to have her heart broken when he took £40,000 she lent him and disappeared.
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The woman lost her entire life savings, as well as much of her self-respect.
After having to take early retirement on health grounds, she began looking for a relationship on the internet.
About 18 months ago she met a man who said his name was Mike and that he was originally from Leicester but was currently in the army and serving abroad in Nigeria.
The woman, who did not want to be named, said: “He made the first move and of course I was flattered.
“We spoke via Messenger or WhatsApp mainly and it felt like we had something.
“He told me he wanted to be with me and he dropped in familiar place names so I felt like he was telling the truth and we had things in common.
“He complimented me all the time and made me feel good about myself.
“We would message a normal amount – sometimes three or four messages a day. He didn’t bombard me.
“He told me he was waiting for some kind of inheritance but that he was struggling for money and in debt until he received it. Eventually he told me he wanted to marry me.
“That’s when he asked if I could send him money.
“At first it was only a small amount – £40 – and I was more than happy to help him. I sent it via bank transfer to someone he told me was an army agent.
“I believed him because I didn’t know how easy it was to access money when you’re in the army and abroad.
“Then the amounts grew bigger, but by then I was so in love with him, I would do anything to keep him happy and he always told me he would pay me back. It was just a case of waiting for his inheritance.”
In fact, throughout their period of contact, the woman ended up sending him nearly £40,000. She took out three bank loans that she secured online and gave him all of her life savings, despite only speaking to him about six times over the telephone.
She said: “He always said it was difficult because of his work but by then I had been completely sucked into his lies.”
Mike also put her in contact with a woman pretending to be the fiancée of another soldier Mike knew.
She said: “There was always a plausible explanation for things.
“But I was getting frustrated and then I ran out of money and he still kept asking for more.
“Now I can see how I was duped into sending him money. He made me think he cared about me but really all he cared about was the cash.
“I feel like if it can happen to me, it can happen to anyone.
“You usually think of romance fraud targeting someone much older, but clearly that wasn’t the case.
“This whole episode has knocked my confidence massively.
“I feel so angry that there are people out there who do this, so I hope that my story can act as a warning to others not to believe everything someone is telling you and to look out for the warning signs and check out what they’re saying.”
To make matters worse – finding the culprit is often very difficult.
In the past year, about 130 Leicestershire victims had lost money in romance frauds, with their losses totalling about £916,000, according to Leicestershire Police.
People are warned to be wary of anyone contacting them from overseas, wherever they claim to be from originally.
The police said these were some of the warning signs common to romance fraud cases:
- People travelling a lot, working abroad or saying they are posted overseas which provides an excuse not to meet in person
- Complimenting you frequently and declaring their love early on
- Little or no digital footprint with very attractive photos
- Making excuses when asked to video call or meet in person
- Asking for a small amount of money at first and perhaps using a tragic reason, such as a death, as to why they might need it
The 43-year-old woman’s case is currently being investigated.
Nicole McIntyre from Leicestershire Police’s Economic Crime Unit, said: “All too often we see situations like this where a persuasive and convincing criminal is involved.
“I hope that what happened to her will act as warning to others about the dangers of dating fraud. There are people out there who seek to prey on others and steal their money.
“Victims often feel guilty or ashamed, but it’s important to remember that these fraudsters are running an organised crime which they are very practiced in.
“If this sounds familiar to you or you know a friend or relative who might be in a similar situation, raise the alarm bell and get in touch with either Action Fraud or call 101.”
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